I started screaming.
Suddenly I blinked and I was in front of a mirror, still brushing my hair (I really shouldn't have settled for low-quality weave). I sighed and walked into my room to get my iPad. I tried not to think of the vision I just had but I couldn't.
Who is Anita? Why did I seem to know her like a best friend? What did that vision mean?
But in all honesty, I was glad to be out of that vision. That... What was that?
I kept trying to forget its face.
It had a two-foot long face (if you can call that a face). The "face" had this dark five-inch hole that
seemed to lead to...God knows where. Its body was covered in olive green scales and somewhere around the sides of its "face" were thorns.
Not horns, thorns.
They looked like steel spearheads. The things that were supposed to be its eyes were like fire, but black. I can't explain that for the life of me. Then it had these dirty large pitchforks for hands, or at least that's what they seemed like. It had a tail or something, I can't tell what that
thing behind it was. I think it was another hand. And it was at least 8 feet tall. That's all I remember.
Thankfully.
How did it fit in that bathroom? More importantly, whose bathroom was that and why were my things in it? And again... WHO IS ANITA?!!
At this point, I remembered what it was looking at.
It wasn't looking at my face as it held me; the thought of its hands in me made me cringe; but it was looking above me. Like I was taller than my 5'7. Now that I thought about it, I wonder, what was it looking at?!
It didn't occur to me before but it seemed strange that it was holding on to me like I was some old friend and it was staring right over my head. I shrugged off the memory, deciding I'll deal with it later. Church first.
I started heading towards the door to walk out when I saw her...
A little girl, not more than 10, chewing furiously on something. She had a half frown and it looked like she had been playing in the dirt, because she had brown stains all over her white dress. Even her mouth was stained so I thought it was probably food or something.
Wait, what is she doing here?! How did she get here?! Who is she? I froze, staring at her. She wiped her mouth and giggled. As she giggled a dark liquid spurted out of her mouth. At this point, I started to panic. What if she's hurt? Then I noticed what was in her other hand.
No. It can't be what... No. Is that...a person's heart?!
My heart skipped a beat. I blinked furiously wishing and praying it was just another vision. I'd really never had visions twice in less than 20 minutes, but I needed that to happen at that point.
I took deep breaths and shook my head several times. Still nothing.
Then she started to walk slowly towards me, a smile on her face. I backed away, not wanting to take my eyes off her. She started running. At first, I tried to be brave and just keep still to see what happened next, but then she stopped in front of me and opened her mouth wide, and what
I saw...
Help me! Help me! Help me!!!
I'm only thinking of help, I'm not even trying to run away. Then I felt something...or someone...pull me from inside my body and I found myself falling...falling...falling...where?!!
I couldn't see, I was rubbing my eyes as I fell and I still only saw black.
Am I blind? What is happening?!! Then I stopped falling, but I still couldn't see.
I called out to anyone. Deep down I was still telling myself that I didn't actually fall into the little girl's mouth.
How? Who falls into a person's mouth?! What am I thinking?!! I told myself to stop being stupid and find a way out of there. But how? Am I even still alive? What if this is what death looks like? What if I'm in hell?
That thought sprung me up and I started trying to feel my way out of there. I tried not to worry about the fact that I still couldn't see. Maybe it's this place.
I reassured myself that if I could get out of there, I'll get my sight back. With that thought giving me a little strength, I moved forward a bit. And it was as I concentrated on moving that another thing came to my notice.
I am floating. There is literally nothing solid under my feet.
I felt instant panic. What is happening?! Am I still falling?! And that was when I started praying under my breath. Our father...Hail Mary...Holy Mary Mother... In the Name of the Father... From that I graduated to full blown prayers, then I heard someone chuckle.
"There is nothing demonic about this my dear, so you can stop praying now."
I tried to find the source of the voice and remembered again that I couldn't see. I started shaking.
Who's there? Why can't I see them? Where am I?
I waited to hear the voice again but there was silence. In frustration, I started sobbing. At that moment I realized the voice sounded familiar and I stopped crying long enough to try to place the voice. It was still in my head so I used that echo to think...
Oh...wait...
I remembered where I last heard the voice and felt a cold chill run through me. It's not possible. This can't be... Can it?
"Dear girl, don't give yourself a headache. This is your show. You're the Ringmaster."
I told him I didn't understand him and he was silent again. I screamed in frustration and swayed a little to the left and...I felt some...thing...someone...
Someone is right next to me. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no...
I called out to whatever it was and the answer I got still makes me ill. It sounded like a painful moan. Whoever or whatever was beside me sounded like they were in pain.
Who is there? Are you okay?
"Awww, so much compassion for something you can't even see. Touching, really."
I asked the voice why I couldn't see and he laughed.
"Why are you asking me? You're the one who has chosen whether to have your sight or not. I told you this is your show."
I didn't understand him but I decided to be brave and ask the pressing question first.
Are you who I think you are?
"And who would that be?"
My father.
I heard the loudest most hysterical laughter ever and I flinched a little. What was so funny? As soon as the laughter subsided he started coughing. Then the cough changed and it seemed like he was choking.
Are you okay?
"I'm as okay as you wish me to be, dear girl"
What does that mean? Why are you talking in riddles?
Then in his silence, a bright light suddenly came on and almost blinded me. Blinded?! I can see!!! I looked around and then as I turned left, I saw... It? Her? Him? What on earth is beside me?
Then I noticed something a little too late, it hadn't been moaning in pain. It had been feeding...On...
...IT HAD BEEN EATING MY FATHER'S STOMACH! Jesus!
I backed away and the thing kept its eyes on me. I looked around and there were literally no doors leading out of there. It looked like we were in a hole. I tried not to panic again but I was failing miserably. I couldn't tell whether my father was still alive or not.
What is this thing? This...creature was even worse and more repulsive than the one in my vision. Vision. This should be a vision. God please let it be a vision.
The creature turned its yellow eyes to me and held my gaze. My back was against the wall so there was literally nowhere to go. I was just there, telling myself, if I get eaten then so be it. I was tired. I needed this to be over.
Then the creature crawled slowly towards me. It didn't take its eyes off me as it advanced. My heart was beating so fast.
So this is how I die? With no explanations, nothing?
I couldn't even cry at this point. As it got closer I shut my eyes and prepared for the worst. I felt it get 3ft close... 2ft...1ft... I felt things like centipedes crawling up my body but I was determined not to scream. I think I was really just emotionally and mentally exhausted at that point. The sound of the...things crawling up my body was all I could hear. Then...
...I opened my eyes...
...there was a mirror in front of me again and I caught my reflection in the mirror...
Jesus... Jesus... Jesus... No...
In the mirror, I stared at my eyes...if you could call them that. The red-black holes... I lifted my pitchfork hands to my face and touched the spearhead thorns... I tried to scream and I growled...
...this is not happening... No...
I shut my eyes and opened them again and there was a bloody human heart in my hand and the
taste of blood and raw meat on my tongue...
Yes. Yes I am it. I have always been it. And her. And him.
I heard this in my head. I felt myself smiling. I felt satisfaction taking over me. I raised the heart up and ran my tongue over it. Hmmm.
Do you know me? Do you love me? Do you? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? What...am I?
